Warren Visit - March 26, 2013

On March 26, 2013 "Warren" entered the chat after previously having left a cryptic countdown in the chat. He openly discussed his role as a worker under the Weaver, and attempted to clear up some misconceptions regarding the Weaver's role in the Searching_for_Loxura situation.

Butterfly names will be substituted for usernames; and logs have been edited for the sake of clarity. Personal information has been redacted.

March 26, 2013

Warren enters the chat
Chat: Hello, Warren.
Hesperiaris: Warren's milkshake brings all the Butterflies to the yard
Warren: Dude, gross. OK, dudes first of all, I am not the weaver, so you can go ahead and lost that thought right now.
Chat: Okay then, who ARE you?
Allyni: Are you a runner?
Warren: The hell is a runner? OK. so lets get some stuff straight. Ya'll called the weaver, I got a file, I do my job. But the way, my job does not include being here talking to you now I am going WAY above and beyond right now. You don't even know. Service with a smile
Warren: :D like dat
Antiopa: so wait you're a person?
Warren: Yes…last time I checked I'm a guy. wait…WAIT yeah…I'm still a guy.
Hesperiaris: Well, stranger things have happened. BUT ANYWAYS.
Warren: Person check!
Antiopa: WAIT, HOLD ON
Warren: I'm holding on. SO TIGHT.
Antiopa: YOU'RE A PERSON?!
Warren: I'm from Brooklyn yo. Wait…are like…12? You sound 12. The hell are you 12?
Antiopa: I'M FIFTEEN.
Warren: Oh God…you're just a kid. The hell am I working with kids.
Chat: Most of us are upwards 20
Warren: Oh thanks God. Adults. Your file, it had this URL and your channels, some information about the situation, yadda yadda, boiler plate, in the mail, Netflix style.
Tarquinius: What exactly is your job though?
Hesperiaris: Are you like, UNIT? SHIELD? MIB?
Thyodamas: Is the weaver your boss or something?
Warren: Nope, never do, never will, don't wanna, not gonna look into it.
Antiopa: You don't wanna get yourself into this.
Warren: GET MYSELF into this? Don't worry.
Allyni: Are you like a Dark Place Merc?
Warren: I just wanted y'all to get I'm not the weaver, so don't be trying to make deals with me. On the other hand…
Thyodamas: Yes?
Warren: I could interest you in some time shares in upstate New York. If you're interested. Prime locations, Prime dates.
Antiopa: If you get a job offer in Seattle, DON'T TAKE IT
Warren: Yeah it rains alot, I need to stay tan
Papilio: So about those files
Warren: What about em?
Papilio: Can we have them?
Warren: Nope. Part of the job.
Antiopa: What is your job?
Warren: They are not FOR you, they are ABOUT you. I didn't ask for this job yo, It runs in the family.
Little Butterfly: The family? You mean like, Roivas' family?
Warren: No I am not part of your happy butterfly club. « in the file.
Hyparete: Your last name Foss?
Antiopa: What is your family name?
Warren: You gonna ask me ASL PICSPICSPICS next? I'm not gonna give you my name sorry bro.
Little Butterfly: Then why are you here, if you're not going to give us anything?
Warren: OK kids lets put on our listening hats: I am not in any way related to anyone in your situation. You called the Weaver, i got a file, I do my job. Watch you, and tell you when weaver is doing their weavery shit. That's my job. Runs in the family. We have been doing this a long time. Other than that, dude I don't know.
Thyodamas: We're always in danger.
Warren: If weaver answered your call, I would say so. You done fucked up son.
Thyodamas: ooohh boy
Antiopa: I knew this was going to happen, I knew we shouldn't have called it!!!
Warren: Ok bro. I didn't say you were in danger cause of the Weaver. I said if it ANSWERED you, you must be in some shit.
Guest_24601: I think he means the Weaver wouldn't have responded if you weren't in danger.
Warren: Guest you got this all figured out. Have a brownie. Do you guys…not know how this works?
Chat: Nope.
Warren: Aw hell naw. You didn't read the contract?
Warren: Naw I'm fucking with yeh, there's no contract.
Chat: D;
Warren: Hold on, I gotta take a squirt.
Chat: Charming.
5 minutes pass
Warren: OK sorry. Roommate was sniping in C.O.D., guy is terrible had to take over. WON IT.
Thyodamas: I didn't know you had a roommate
Warren: He's a cab driver. And he sucks at C.O.D.
Thyodamas: Why'd you ask other-me to go keep punching SFL? What's the deal with that?
Warren: And you asked if I was human…right
Thyodamas: I am one-half a human. The other half is…elsewhere.
Warren: Sounds like you've got some should searching to do.
Thyodamas: I will do that right after I kick Searching's ass.
Warren: Search on proud tiny lady.
Thyodamas: I'm not THAT small!
Warren: AW snap.
Antiopa: I have a question, if you'll answer me this time.
Warren: sup?
Antiopa: Why does the weaver do this? What does it get in return for helping people?
Warren: The weaver, thats what it's called. Prolly a smug satisfaction.
Antiopa: Why do you keep calling me "son"? I'm not a boy!
Warren: I don't know bro.
Hyparete: Weaver just outsources to the dude.
Warren: This guy gets it. I'm a middle man you. I'm all up in the middle and yep: still a man.
Hellion: Have you ever seen him?
Warren: Seen him? What the weaver? Shit you cray
Antiopa: You…shit
Warren: Nope, I am not a shit. Still a man. With a smile.
Denitza: What did you see in the file?
Warren: there was a LOT to read bro. I skimmed it, James bond marathon was on son, I aint got all day. Ok well what's your situation then? Who is dead?
Thyodamas: No one's dead yet! Well, someone was dead but they came back.
Antiopa: I almost got killed the other week.
Warren: You almost died?
Chat: Run from Slendy. And Help3r. And everyone.
Warren: I will from now on be sure to run from everyone. So wait the weaver answered yall and no one is even dead yet?
Andre: Not that we know of.
Thyodamas: We're just too awesome to die!
Warren: I doubt that.
Chat links a list of links regarding Searching_for_Loxura
Warren: I aint readin this shit, just tell me yo.
Allyni: summarizes the situations for Warren
Warren: And? That's it? Really?
Glaucopsyche: Okay when you came in and gave us a countdown, what was that for?
Warren: That's my job fruit salad. Not my choice.
Glaucopsyche: What was it counting to though, the weavers action?
Warren: I'm just surprised you got an answer with just that. Yall all need to stop talking at once. I'm already trying to do this AND watch Gossip Girl. People's lives are always on the line you. You are not special. Sorry bro.
Tarquinius: Your choice of entertainment is quite varied…
Warren: I'm complicated.
Hyparete: What do you get outta this job with the Weaver?
Antiopa: You seem kind of ADD to me too.
Warren: CLINICALLY ADD. Yes indeed. Anyway. Butt fuck nothin.
Antiopa: Then why do you do it?
Hellion: Because it's in the family?
Warren: And circle gets the square. I do it, Dad did it, his dad did it, one and on yo. WAY easier with the internet.
Antiopa: Makes a threat
Warren: You are a very violent person. Have a tea. Chillax. I, am terrified now. Fire, oh no. MY WEAKNESS. Ok explain this evil casper. What do yall know about em?
Thyodamas: Explains SFL
Warren: O yeah Loxura, in the file. handsome fellow, kinda stringy. So you all are founders of the "lets get in with evil stuff and die" club. Yall done stuff that worked in the past?
Glaucopsyche: On other things.
Caligo: We tried a good deal of things.
Warren: Then I doubt your scary thing is really not affected. It prolly just knows how to hid from it. Aight, hold your panties, Ima watch this shit and boil a hot dog.
Glaucopsyche: I think Warren's just jaded with this shit. He has not fucks left to give.
Warren: Jaded like a fox yo. Ok. Trust me yall, no on here is dead, there is much worse. haha, I meant trust me that there are worse cases, I could give a shit if you trust me. It's your funeral, I'm still gonna do my job.
Antiopa: makes another threat
Warren: I am TERRIFIED of the fourteen year old. I think I need to lie down for a minute. Ok, so, in these videos your little spookie is getting closer and closer. This little nellie is trying to cross over. Well, you don't really seem to know anything about it man.
Hyparete: And if he crosses over?
Warren: You need to either figure out what it is, or get something that is born of it.
Chat: We have some string?
Warren: Yall are real testy for a bunch of folks not paying me, get me bro? my job is to tell yall when waver is coming that's it. It can get all kindsa on your shoulders real fast if you like.
Denitza: is the weaver coming again anytime soon?
Warren: Define soon. What soon?
Denitza: Within a month?
Warren: I can't see that far, but I don't think it's coming too soon.
Glaucopsyche: Would it come again without us calling it again?
Warren: I dunno sometimes it just pops the fuck up while I'm trying to eat a burrito.
Glaucopsyche: I assumed it was a one-time deal.
Warren: It's not a science yo. I will call it when I see it, that's my job. Whatevs man.
Thyodamas: Then why did you come in about Rosemary? That's not the weaver.
Warren: Above and beyond. Service with a smile. If you need something born of this thing, and your other you or whatever is going where it lives, that seems like something you wanna not call off. Get me? In the file it said it was following music or some shit. That's a spectral hiccup. That will lead where it lives, it's unconscious.
Antiopa: How much info do you HAVE on us, can you give us maybe an idea?
Warren: Of what I know about you?
Antiopa: How much info do you have on our situation?
Warren: Its a STACK bro. Fat stacks.
Allyni: Is it all on paper, or did you at least get a USB stick?
Warren: Old school man
Thyodamas: Okay I gotta go now, good night!
Warren: begone little lady!
Antiopa: Threatens Warren again
Warren: If you guys have mastered murder through the computer you don't need the weaver :D
Allyni: We basically got into this just to help one guy and it kinda snowballed.
Warren: Worth it?
Hesperiaris: …yes.
Samuelis: Yes.
Septentrionis: So far yes.
Warren: Well, good on yall. Being all noble and shit. So all really don't know how any of this works.
Hellion: Nope.
Warren: How did you even hear about it?
Tarquinius: A friend told us rumors.
Hyparete: We wing it and try not to get killed.
Warren: Well good luck and all that. Farethewell shit. I'm gonna take a bubble bath. l8
Warren leaves the chat

Special thanks to Banana for compiling this chat log